Contemptuous Sadness

A lot has been going on lately. The changes in my life and the dire economics are just too much to handle at once.

I have never felt the urgency to grow and toughen up like now. I guess you reach a certain point in life when you are called upon, and you cannot deny the call or reject it. Being a mom is so nice and fulfilling, but men it is serious business.

To every parent out there, kudos to you and may you get the strength and the love to keep your family together.

An unsespected resurection

Life is really funny. Just when I thought that I got a hold of my existence and of the life itself, it pulled me back to reality. reminding me that the control I am bragging about is only an illusion.

I thought I had made it, I took the turn that will change it all. Make it all go away. I though that i had forgotten what was...that I was over it...But, oh! How shocking it was to realise that all the memories I had "buried" and moaned over are still alive. waiting behind the curtain for the...I was going to say the perfect moment, but it was not. How can it be more perfect than the birth of my child? How can it take me away from my family? from enjoying my new baby.

Despite it all, I have to admit that I am glad to see him again but I cannot stop thinking...I wonder why? Why did you come back, resurface now? And how did I forget about the heartache?

Is it a sign that times are about to change? Is it you who found me or is it me, who found whom? Oh, well! We will see...Times will tell.